{"id":4029,"date":"2016-10-13T03:23:20","date_gmt":"2016-10-13T03:23:20","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/stephaniearnold.net\/?p=4029"},"modified":"2016-10-13T12:40:30","modified_gmt":"2016-10-13T12:40:30","slug":"least-wasnt-holocaust","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/stephaniearnold.net\/es\/2016\/10\/13\/least-wasnt-holocaust\/","title":{"rendered":"At Least I Wasn&#8217;t In The Holocaust"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>I used to say this all the time. \u00a0Something bad would happen, like a boy broke my heart\u00a0and I would say &#8220;At least I wasn&#8217;t in the Holocaust.&#8221; \u00a0I failed an exam, &#8220;At least I wasn&#8217;t in the Holocaust.&#8221; And again, when I had three benign lumps removed from my breasts, I would repeat the saying &#8220;At least I wasn&#8217;t in the Holocaust.&#8221; \u00a0My friends and family would say, &#8220;I think it is an unfair comparison,&#8221; maybe so, but when I actually thought about what it would mean to live and die or survive the Holocaust, everything else seemed insignificant. \u00a0My life&#8217;s disappointments were nothing but a bump in the road and I knew I would recover.\u00a0Not many could have said that if they experienced WWII first-hand.<\/p>\n<p><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"size-full wp-image-4042 alignleft\" src=\"http:\/\/stephaniearnold.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/10\/Unknown-1.jpeg\" alt=\"unknown-1\" width=\"259\" height=\"194\" srcset=\"https:\/\/stephaniearnold.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/10\/Unknown-1.jpeg 259w, https:\/\/stephaniearnold.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/10\/Unknown-1-16x12.jpeg 16w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 259px) 100vw, 259px\" \/>My Rabbi talked about Elie Wiesel in his sermon today. \u00a0How prayer and belief in G-d can wain\u00a0through traumas and circumstances. &#8220;Coincidentally,&#8221; I had bought &#8220;Night&#8221;(Wiesel&#8217;s first book on his experience in the\u00a0Holocaust),\u00a0a few months ago and dropped it in my carry-on, to re-read when I had the chance.<\/p>\n<p>Flying back from LA to Chicago the other night, I had our\u00a0little boy asleep as we took off \u00a0and a 5 year old, happy as a clam watching her Barbie movie. A peaceful moment.\u00a0Now was my chance.<\/p>\n<p>The horror of what happened in the 1930&#8217;s\/40&#8217;s in Europe will never be lost on me. \u00a0As a little girl I had heard plenty of stories, seen more than my share of documentaries and met many survivors to know I will never, ever forget what happened. \u00a0Those images in the museums in Israel and Washington D.C. are so emblazoned in my mind, I used to think they were an extension of me. \u00a0And they were. \u00a0My ancestors, my family, my lineage, my people. \u00a0So when others would have their own difficulties in life I would say\u00a0&#8220;It could be worse, at least you weren&#8217;t in the Holocaust.&#8221; I was not trying to be insensitive, I was trying to put their pain in perspective as I was trying to help. Albeit, not well based on the reactions I would get. \u00a0I was always told, \u00a0&#8220;You cannot compare one&#8217;s current situations with that of the atrocities and lives lost many decades ago.&#8221; \u00a0My answer was always &#8220;Why not?&#8221; It wasn&#8217;t to make me feel better, it was just my perspective. There will always be\u00a0someone who is in a worse position, so I&#8217;m going to be ok. I will\u00a0survive. That mindset served me well over the past three years.<\/p>\n<p>With everything that has <a href=\"http:\/\/stephaniearnold.net\/es\/about-2\/\">happened to my family<\/a>, how our faith\u00a0has\u00a0been tested by surviving the impossible, how our family is intact through belief and prayer, I ask myself, &#8220;How is it one can survive something so horrific and not believe G-d exists?&#8221; \u00a0At the same time asking, &#8220;How one can survive watching the pain and suffering and believing a loving G-d would allow it to happen?&#8221; \u00a0How would I feel if I were alive back then, compared to how I feel now.<\/p>\n<p>After witnessing everything I saw before and after those <a href=\"http:\/\/stephaniearnold.net\/es\/author\/\">37 Seconds<\/a>, I can tell you I believe 100% in G-d&#8217;s will. And the power of prayer. \u00a0But I also believe in the power of one&#8217;s own inner strength. And how to fight the beasts inside all of us who keep telling us to give it up. Whatever IT is to you.<\/p>\n<p>Plowing through the pages and learning how children were stripped from their families and thrown into the gas chambers, I stroked my daughter&#8217;s hair and a tear fell from my face onto the book. \u00a0She was so engrossed in her movie, she hadn&#8217;t noticed. \u00a0But I noticed my overwhelming feeling to hold onto both of my children at that moment. \u00a0To grab hold and never let go. \u00a0And had I been faced with the same experiences these women went through to protect their children, I most certainly would have been counted among the Six Million who lost their lives, protecting the lives of their loved ones and holding onto faith Hashem would find his way to protect our souls.<\/p>\n<p>I got a glimpse of this terror in the months <a href=\"http:\/\/stephaniearnold.net\/es\/about-the-book-37-seconds\/\">before I died.<\/a> \u00a0I wasn&#8217;t tortured by Nazis and in comparison, like I did in the &#8220;old days,&#8221; I now realize, I could have stayed dead but it wouldn&#8217;t have been the end of my family. \u00a0Silver lining perhaps. \u00a0A different way to look at my trauma maybe..\u00a0<img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"wp-image-4043 alignright\" src=\"http:\/\/stephaniearnold.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/10\/Unknown-2.jpeg\" alt=\"unknown-2\" width=\"151\" height=\"233\" srcset=\"https:\/\/stephaniearnold.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/10\/Unknown-2.jpeg 181w, https:\/\/stephaniearnold.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/10\/Unknown-2-8x12.jpeg 8w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 151px) 100vw, 151px\" \/><\/p>\n<p>Elie Weisel&#8217;s witness to the horrifying teenage life he led in the camps is hard to swallow. \u00a0And as I was nearing the end of the book, I began to understand hope. \u00a0Hope for a new life, hope for a new beginning, a new strength, seeing the bright future ahead of all of us. \u00a0 Then, 45 minutes left in the flight, that bright light started to dim. \u00a0 My son woke up abruptly and began to scream and be disagreeable the entire rest of the flight. \u00a0What started out as a pleasant, dream-like beginning was ending in a screeching, crying nightmare\u00a0for all around me. \u00a0It was painful. Extremely painful. But again, not as bad as others have had it.<\/p>\n<p>A change of perspective allowed me to see how beautiful this night was about to become. As\u00a0things started to calm down at home, I put Jacob to bed and I kissed him goodnight. I started to turn\u00a0off the lights and walk out of his room, when he says to me- &#8220;Mommy?&#8221; \u00a0I answered &#8220;Yes, Jacob.&#8221; \u00a0&#8220;Have \u00a0sweet dreams mommy.&#8221; \u00a0That was the most incredible thing he said on tonight of all nights. \u00a0This was the first time he had ever said such a thing and it was more meaningful tonight because he wasn&#8217;t aware of what today was. \u00a0It was the Jewish New Year and we wish everyone a sweet and happy new year. \u00a0Tonight is the start of mine. \u00a0To everyone out there: Sweet Dreams, tonight and every NIGHT\u00a0to come. Appreciate all you have. \u00a0Your life and the lives you have surrounding you, are blessings. \u00a0And be grateful you were never in the Holocaust.<\/p>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>I used to say this all the time. \u00a0Something bad would happen, like a boy broke my heart\u00a0and I would say &#8220;At least I wasn&#8217;t in the Holocaust.&#8221; \u00a0I failed an exam, &#8220;At least I wasn&#8217;t in the Holocaust.&#8221; And again, when I had three benign lumps removed from my breasts, I would repeat the&#8230;<\/p>","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":4041,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"_wp_convertkit_post_meta":{"form":"-1","landing_page":"0","tag":"0","restrict_content":"0"},"footnotes":""},"categories":[5,124,14,15,20,25,26],"tags":[137,136,84,101],"class_list":["post-4029","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-advocacy","category-family","category-life-death","category-love","category-patient-education","category-share-your-story","category-spirituality","tag-elie-wiesel","tag-holocaust","tag-near-death-experience","tag-spirituality-2"],"acf":[],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v27.4 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/product\/yoast-seo-wordpress\/ -->\n<title>At Least I Wasn&#039;t In The Holocaust - Stephanie Arnold<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/stephaniearnold.net\/es\/2016\/10\/13\/least-wasnt-holocaust\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"es_ES\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"At Least I Wasn&#039;t In The Holocaust - Stephanie Arnold\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"I used to say this all the time. \u00a0Something bad would happen, like a boy broke my heart\u00a0and I would say &#8220;At least I wasn&#8217;t in the Holocaust.&#8221; 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