He would KILL me for posting his deep thoughts. As my #BFF says, “You have a poo-poo mouth.” I can’t help it. I want EVERYONE to experience a level of love they cannot live or die without. So I post.

I am “envious of me.” I want to cry every time I open up one of my husband’s letters. After 11 years together, I still get these beautiful, hand-written notes about how lucky he is. But it really is I, who is lucky. Lucky to have found him. Lucky to love so deeply. And incredibly lucky to have survived so we both don’t have to wonder….

What happens to love when you die?

We talk about where our bodies go and the possibility of what happens to the soul, but what about LOVE?

I watched a Facebook Watch recently about a man who met his soulmate, married four months later and then his husband was diagnosed with non-Hodgkin’s lymphoma. He was dying. And the thing he feared the most was he just found the love of his life, how could it be gone so soon? (You can watch it HERE, get your tissues ready).

I have also been scared on my way out of this life, I would never be able to feel my soulmate again. The love of my life. His touch. His sweet gaze into my eyes which still takes my breath away. The fear of dying was not because of the “fear of dying”, but because I would lose the connection to the love I have been lucky enough to find.

MORE THAN A FEELING

Yes, love is in part a feeling. But to many, it is a growing and powerful energy which lives and breathes outside of our bodies. You can feel it looking across a crowded room. Your heart aches when your love is not physically there.

One of the reasons I took the journey into the regression therapy was not written in 37 Seconds. Yes, I wanted to put the pieces of the puzzle back together of the time lost to me. And I wanted to remember those moments where I wasn’t there. BUT, my husband, as analytical and skeptical and scientific as he is, I wanted to put the invisible lines connecting point A to point B together so he could FEEL what happened. And that was a tall order to fulfill.

I could tell Jonathan how I felt and what I was experiencing, but because he wasn’t feeling any of it, there was no way he could understand what I was saying. It was all gibberish to him. And I NEEDED him to understand.

In sickness and in health they say. From his point of view, I came back from this catastrophe sicker more mentally than physically. And I was devastated he was not on the same page. I mean, if I did expire permanently, does that mean he wouldn’t feel me if I tried to connect with him in the afterlife? I wasn’t going to let that happen.

It’s CHEMISTRY

I did empirical research, collected data, did interviews and provided a data set, in his own language, to help him start believing in the world he cannot see. I had more “dead-on” premonitions and saw things he witnessed I should not have been able to see. He started to warm up to the idea this “energy” does not have an expiration date, it just changes form. It took almost a year.

Love TRANSCENDS LIFE! I have seen it. I have experienced it. I have felt it in other’s situations. Love does not end when life does. It changes form. Those you have lost are not gone for good. They have just gone from a solid to a gas. They are still around, even if you are trying to reach out and get no answer in return.

Pay attention to the signs. The images which come to you in dreams. Your child looking up into “nothingness.” A familiar scent in a place where it should be. Open your heart to the endless possibilities and then you will realize, it isn’t improbable, it is likely. “LOVE IS IN THE AIR!”

Love & LIGHT.